Eenie, Meenie, Mine, Mine Mine!!

Today I learned that everyone, even the most sincere and honest people, can be selfish.  It's an ugly thing in the hands of some people, and pitiful in the hands of others.  Being selfish can be embarrassing once the person sees themselves and it's those people that are easily forgiven for their selfishness.  

The self-entitled selfish people, well, they are a different story entirely.  

I am a sharer.  I learned it as a small child, like most well mannered individuals.  Share your toys.  Share your snack.  Share your knowledge.  Share the credit.  Yes, I am a sharer from way back.  What I haven't learned yet is, when sharing, you give a little and keep a little.  Sharing gives you the chance to determine the amount of whatever it is you are willing to share.  Sharing only the smallest amount, however, can make you actually look selfish.  Like you are sharing to make yourself look good but you really aren't willing to give much up.

Especially the credit.

I tend to share the greater amount.  Cut the sandwich in half, I give the large half.  Three cookies...I give two and keep one.  Letting the share-ee choose the toys they want first.  You get it.  When it comes to the credit...I tend to give it all.  

Credit where credit is due is something people say, not something I live by...I work like a dog for days on a huge project for the entire enterprise, leaving my own work to flounder in the background, and give every ounce of credit to the person who asked me to create it.  For the most part, I am happy about doing the project for this person who I like.  But then my selfish side rears it's ugly head...I receive no credit at all for hours and hours of work unless and until something goes wrong with it.  Then I hear "Suzanne did it!"...of course I did.  I don't hear anyone saying "Suzanne did it!" when they are handing out pats on the back or a bonus!  

See?  Selfish.  

I selfishly want to get some small amount of recognition when the job is well received, not just when it is criticized.  I want the pat on the back.  I want the "Suzanne did it?  Excellent work!"  

But, when I am asked to do another big project...even to the detriment of getting the rest of my own projects done...Even while having to explain why my own projects are no further when last I was asked...I will do it.  I will do it well and give the asker the credit.  I will seethe because I didn't let anyone know I did the work and someone else took all the credit?  

Did they?

Did they take all the credit or did I freely give it away?  

Excellent question...

Later...