The land of Negativity

I swear!  I am so negative of late...even for me.  I have largely been the glass half empty type for most of my life but I have always aspired to the glass half full.  I think being around unhappy, negative people is not helping one small bit but what can I do?  

I am trapped.

As I become more and more unhappy (or is it less and less happy?) I find myself being even more anti-social than usual.  For the past several years as my health has declined, I have wanted to socialize less and less.  I want to be at home in my own space.  I talk all day and when I come home I am quite done and want only to sit quietly with my dog.  

My youngest son wants to come visit this week.  He said he and his new wife and her 3 year old wild-child are coming on Thursday and staying until Sunday.  This would normally be fine but my workload is enormous, I have ICD-10 starting on Thursday, I just found out I have to work late Thursday and Friday and will likely have to work Saturday...And telling my son I would rather reschedule is not on my top 10 list of things to do...ever.  He has become easy to upset in recent months.

My house isn't ready for company but he has been so moody lately I am afraid to tell him for fear he will be angry.  

I think this stress might actually kill me.

I will try to pull myself out of this funk but if you've been reading my posts you will know I have so much to deal with right now that I think one more thing will surely make me blow up!

My apologies for taking you to the Land of Negativity.  I hope your ride was less unpleasant than it could have been.  I know you have a choice when reading a blog and I am so happy you chose mine.  Please travel with me again...I promise to make it less painful!

Later...